Monthly Archives: November 2005

learning the hard way

i had a problem with the pc this weekend. had to have the hard drive taken out and all my stuff moved so it could be reformatted. had a bunch of poems on there, something i was working on for a christmas present, and a book also. yes, call me stupid, i didnt back it up anywhere. you always say, oh yeah im gonna do that. yep im gonna get to that. un hun. well i didnt and lost it.
thats learning the hard way.
 

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Thought, Reality, and a Dream

I could
If I wanted to
Get on a bus
To some no name place
Become just another
No name face
 
Stand at the road
Stick out my thumb
Ride off somewhere
Maybe theres a no name woman
Waiting for me there
 
Just like I thought
Many times before
Maybe the time will come
Youll wonder where I went
Wonder what Ive done
 
And I will think of you
When the night is fading away
In early morning light
When memories are leaving
Youll still be in my mind
 
As I remember what was
And what was not
All the things I could not see
How innocent you were
And how cruel I could be
 
In a dream you held me from behind
With your arms around me tight
Your head upon my back
And all you could say
If I hold you like this, you cant push me away.

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All That’s Left

What is there really left to say
Sitting here alone at the end of the day
Thoughts and words just dont seem right
Theres no way to say them at the end of the night
Every little thing that I thought I knew
Maybe its wrong, am I getting thru
Ill make it easy for you
 
 
Remembering all the good times we had
I couldnt believe they were all that bad
Sometimes I wonder what makes us choose
When you know you cant win you got nothing to lose
No use for tears no time to cry
When all thats left is the last goodbye
Ill make it easy for you
 
Take a look around tell me what you see
There must be a million thats better than me
You want a lot of things that I cant give
The way we’re living aint a way to live
I took a big chance and I rolled the dice
Sometimes the gamble dont work out right
Ill make it easy for you
 
I cant forget you
And I wouldnt try
You know I still love you
And sometimes goodbye
Just dont sound right
 
 
So Ill see you later somewhere down the line
You can think of me a bit from time to time
Just remember the way I made you laugh
Dont think about hearts that are cut in half
Maybe someday youll change your mind
Ill be hanging around until that time
Ill make it easy for you
 
 
 
 
 

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Modified

they plucked out my eye to make it the norm
they adjusted my nose to make it perform
they infused me with mesh and metal hoops
they cut out the power to reproduce
for all these things they have done to me
i am still flawed as i will always be
opened the air tight case
and exposed my soul
spiritually incomplete
physically whole

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Home Cooking

a little something for Lord Nial. havent we all had a meal like this at one time or another?
 
 
Youre a spoiled piece of pastry
I wish I’d never touched
All that I can say to you
Is thank you very much
 
For all the lies you fed me
That I was more than happy to eat
You served it up with no name class
It was a meal that you couldnt  beat
 
You knew that I was starving when you met me
And you said you’d cook something good
I never thought that it would taste so bitter
I never thought anything ever could
 
I love the way you threw in
All those I love you’s in the pot
How I was the best you ever had
Was the best I ever got
 
Youve made me sick to my stomach
Theres vomit stuck in my throat
Id throw up if you were worth it
So full of hate that I could choke
 
Youre appetizers were tempting
The meal was good till half way thru
The desert was damn revolting
But not half as much as you
 
Youre a tainted salmonella dish
With a distictly seafood smell
I hope your contaminated words of love
In the future serve you well
 
In closing thanks for a lovely meal
Let me leave you with these words
I hope you find someone just like you
And you get what you deserve.
 
 
 

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Shadow of the Ghost

We are the shadow of the ghost
Something less than even a phantom
Staring into the mirror
Searching for what we think should be there
Never satisfied with what we find
 
We are the sons and daughters
Misled and abandoned
Through mistake and fault
Forever filled with a want
And a yearning that no one can understand
 
We would drink till our mind is clouded
We would cut till our eyes see reality
Our desire to step off the edge is surpassed
Only by our desire to hear someone say
That they truly love us for what we are
 
We are the writers of a story
To bitter to be read
By eyes that were nutured
With love and sacrifice
That can never be forgotten
 
We are the voices that sing
The song of the soul
Pitiful and yearning in its desire
To find the missing note
That will complete the melody
 
We would have the love we were denied
We would have the hope of a trust unspoken
Our desire to have someone hold us is surpassed
Only by our desire to have someone, anywhere, say,
That they love us, and mean it
 
We pass you on the street
And you are blissfully unaware
When we cry tears of love
And tears of rejection
Into the soft eiderdown
 
That cradles our head
As we ask
Why doesnt someone love me,
Anymore?
 

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eddie guerrero 1967-2005

only a wrestling fan is going to appreciate this. wrestlers give up time with their family, put their bodies thru hell usually more than 300 days of the year, not to mention the charities and personal appearances they do which you dont hear about like the Childrens Make A Wish foundation which the WWE has always been very much involved with. the point of all this is i am a huge wrestling fan and have been since i was a kid. so i feel like i lost someone i knew today. he had a wife and 3 daughters aged 14, 9 and 3 years old.  he was only 38 years old. man this friggin sucks. wrestling fans are loyal eddie. to his family, you know we will never forget. we love you man. bye.

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